Cuddle me...

K... I'm having a little issue. It's not really a big deal, but it seems to be ruling my thoughts the past few days.
A friend of mine pointed out that the way I am physically with my partner is strange especially since I'm such a touchy feely kinda person. Well, I love sex... love it, love it, love it! I've been going nuts lately because of the problems in my marriage. When my husband and I are getting along we have great sex and I don't have any complaints in that department. But lately none for me. It's kinda hard to have sex or cuddle someone your so angry with.
I had dinner with SmartAssBF and his girlfriend and we were talking about bedtime routines and cuddling. When, I realized that I am seriously lacking in this department. I brought the subject up because one of the nights that the husband and I had an exceptionally bad blow up I didn't feel safe at home so I left the house and went to SmartAssBF's house. Another friend, we will call him CivilRights, was there. We ended up staying up most of the night talking about everything. When the conversation moved to my issues with my husband, I started crying. No, scratch that... Blubbering mess is more like it! Anyway, CivilRights crawled up onto the couch and just held me. Now I now, this doesn't sound strange to most people, but to me this was a new thing. My Husband use to cuddle with me years ago... For the past 6 years I can probably count on my hands and feet the number of times that he has actually come to bed at the same time as me. He finally hits the bed anywhere from midnight to 3 in the morning. What is he doing you ask? Well he is down in the dungeon, (for the rest of you that's the basement) playing on his computer or many gaming systems.
Anyway, back to the cuddling.
At first it was extremely strange to have someone just hold me, but after a while I realized that I really enjoyed having that interaction. Now, I miss it and want it desperately!

Here's the screwed up thing, you ready? Suddenly, now that my dear husband has realized that our marriage is ending he has been trying to cuddle me lately. And I don't want him touching me at all! Even just his hand on my side feels like Godzilla is touching me. Yes, I know beggars shouldn't be chooser. But, I want what I want and wont apologize for it!

Cuddle me, Cuddle me, Cuddle me!!!